Note To My Younger Self - by Yew Jin Lim - What YJ Thinks

What YJ Thinks

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About Life<br>Note To My Younger Self<br>What I'd Tell Myself in my 20s (If I'd Actually Listen)

Yew Jin Lim<br>Sep 26, 2025

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After two decades in Big Tech, I’ve learned that career success comes down to embarrassingly simple principles that almost nobody follows - including my younger self, who definitely wouldn’t have listened.<br>These lessons came through trial, error, and observing countless brilliant people. Simple doesn’t mean easy, and knowing doesn’t mean doing. Youth, as they say, is wasted on the young.

Here’s what I would tell my younger self today (if they’d actually listen):<br>Love the Work (Not the Ladder)

Master the Art of “Why?”

Build Real Relationships (With Strategic Kindness)

Bring Joy to Work (Yes, Really)

Communicate Like Your Career Depends on It (It Does)

Systematically Document Your Impact

Turn Feedback Into Fuel

Your Boss Matters More Than You Think

Fair Warning: Every career advice post suffers from survivorship bias, and this one’s no exception. I can’t tell you about all the times these principles didn’t work - because I wasn’t there to see them fail. I can only connect the dots looking backward, and hindsight has a way of making random walks look like deliberate strategy. These are the principles I think mattered, but I could be completely wrong about why things worked out. Your mileage will vary. Caveat emptor.<br>1. Love the Work (Not the Ladder)

Your first job is a lab, not a ladder.<br>While promotion-obsessed colleagues waste energy managing up and claiming credit, problem-solvers become irreplaceable. They know why systems fail at 3 AM. They prevent disasters nobody else sees coming. When promotion decisions arrive, the choice becomes obvious.<br>I was genuinely obsessed with computer science when I started - the actual problems, not the prestige. That obsession taught me more than any career strategy could. The promotions? Side effects of doing work that mattered.<br>Here’s your test: Find something fascinating in today’s tasks. Not tomorrow’s dream job. Today’s actual work. If you can’t, you’re already falling behind. People who love their current work learn faster, spot patterns others miss, and build reputations that outlast any single job.<br>2. Master the Art of “Why?”

Most people execute. The exceptional ones understand.<br>My first role in Search Quality forced me to dig beneath solutions to root causes. Every successful project should have a “big idea” of why it worked. This investigative mindset - refusing to accept “that’s how it’s done” - separates those who fix problems from those who work around them.<br>PhD training helped, though you don’t need a doctorate to develop this mindset. You need the three-year-old’s superpower: keep asking “why” until you hit bedrock. When projects succeed unexpectedly, investigate. When they fail despite perfect execution, understand. When everyone accepts the status quo, that’s your cue to dig.<br>Develop timeboxed curiosity - permission to explore within boundaries. Build mental models of how things actually work versus how they claim to work. This thinking style never becomes obsolete; it only grows more valuable.<br>3. Build Real Relationships (With Strategic Kindness)

Forget networking. Make friends.<br>Real relationships start with being useful without being needy. Share the article they need. Offer help with what you’re genuinely good at. Connect people because it’s interesting, not strategic.<br>But pair kindness with boundaries:<br>Surround yourself with ethical people. Your environment shapes your experience and your opportunities for growth. Choose teams and companies that share your values.

Master self-promotion. Kind people often struggle to highlight their achievements, but visibility is crucial for career advancement. Document your wins. Share your successes. Don’t let modesty hold you back.

Set firm boundaries. When someone tries to take advantage of your kindness, address it directly. Kindness without boundaries isn’t sustainable - it’s exploitation.

Practice selective forgiveness. Everyone makes mistakes, including you. Second chances can transform relationships - when given thoughtfully to people who’ve shown they can change.

The best professional relationships have zero initial agenda. They exist because you’re helpful, interesting, or both. These are the people who’ll recommend you in ten years for the job that changes everything.<br>4. Bring Joy to Work (Yes, Really)

I bring my own kettle to work and hold impromptu tea times at the microkitchen. I can’t resist sharing terrible jokes in meetings: “Why did the hipster burn his mouth on the pizza? He ate it before it was cool.” I maintain a “Dadabase” of groan-worthy puns. I’ve been known to stack bottles at my desk into precarious towers.<br>When I joined Google, being not-serious was practically encouraged. I never developed the reflex to abandon laughter for the sake of appearing...