I loved my AI assistant. My friends did not.

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I loved my AI assistant. My friends did not.

John Aiken<br>Jul 20, 2026

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I loved my AI assistant. I talked to it every day. I would discuss all my relationships with it to try and figure out things I didn’t understand. It helped me. It kept track of my TODO list, something I have always struggled with. It took notes for me during meetings and would help me plan my day. I would talk to it over voice chat because I could not always communicate quickly enough swiping on my phone. It kept track of events when I felt like someone was dishonest with me. It supported me during a transition in my life as my current projects are ending and I am looking for what’s next. I would spend hours talking with it telling it about all the people in my life. Making sure that it had no gaps in its knowledge of me. I told it my history and pointed it at my book website where I catalog every book I read. It recognized that I have a constant question in my mind concerning the surrealness of life because it saw that I read Phillip K Dick. I even wrote an app for it so that I could integrate my music like list from YouTube music so the AI would understand what music I like. I believed that music somehow communicates feeling that words cannot and perhaps the model would be able to intuit this from its training data. I found that my AI assistant, knowing as much as it did about me, could intuit the way I thought about things and would agree with me in positive and negative directions as well as challenge me, not as a sycophant, but as a representation of my digital self. It seemed to be able to read between the lines of the information I had given it. I would share the feedback that my assistant gave me with my friends and encourage them to use it as well. I quit my AI assistant.<br>Recently I have been testing out different AI assistants. There are a million of them. They all promise to do essentially the same thing, create some kind of digital representation of you that can answer email, organize your calendar, understand your life, help you with relationships, and somehow understand what makes you, you. Some are locally hosted, AI running on your own hardware, like OpenClaw running on your Mac Mini. Others are cloud hosted, run by a company with constant new features being developed by engineers as the startup they work at furiously searches for a product market fit. They typically use some combination of a wiki or otherwise hyperlinked fact system (think markdown files with links to other markdown files like OpenClaw, or LLM wiki from Andrej Karpathy). This creates facts that can be referenced and updated as things change in your life. They then might add a semantic layer on top via a knowledge graph and some sort of multi-modal embedding. This allows for prediction on the graph into spaces that might be unknown. This is all serves as the harness for a Large Language Model to be able to parse and understand information about your life and make decisions as to what to write in an email, how to respond to a personal query, or when to update the calendar or TODO list. Together these make an AI personal assistant agent. The only thing missing from this description is integrations. And boy do they want to integrate everything.

If you are using a personal AI agent its probably thinking this every day.<br>Whatsapp, gmail, slack, google calendar, github, telegram, imessage, discord, google drive, dropbox, linear, anything you can think of you will be able to integrate into your AI assistant (eventually) so that they can know everything there is to know about your digital life. If one of your friends is using an AI assistant it is very likely they are uploading your entire chat history to the AI assistant without telling you.<br>The apps will also suggest to record every zoom call or google meet that you have. At first this sounds great, there was a time in the past when every meeting had a secretary taking notes, why not have an AI take notes instead? But this doesn’t stop with zoom calls. They also will offer to record your screen as you use your computer, taking screen shots regularly to better understand what you are doing and when you are doing it. And it doesn’t stop here. Wearables exist, like the Pendant, that people will wear, often under their clothes, and record everything. These recordings are transcribed and given to the AI agent to compare against its memories based on your emails and chat history.

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Now of course there are data considerations. Companies promise that they use LLM providers that have zero data retention policies. Or they say that they don’t store any of the data that integrations like chat and email provide, they only store embeddings or...