I'm leaving OpenAI to build Jurassic Park

I'm leaving OpenAI to build Jurassic Park

I'm so grateful for my time at OpenAI, where I led alignment safety for the<br>official ChatGPT basketball.<br>I gained so much valuable experience building Altman's armageddon engines, and<br>I'm taking it to the next level with my new startup: Jurassic Park.

At Jurassic Park, we're resurrecting the ultimate apex predators to defend<br>humanity against misaligned AI.

Cyberdefense Capabilities

Further reading:<br>OpenAI incident report,<br>Anthropic incident report.

According to the fossil record, dinosaurs lived for 165 million years without a<br>single recorded AI cyberattack. Many speculate that dinosaurs developed a<br>natural immunity to artificial intelligence threats.

Datacenters evolved strong concrete exoskeletons to protect their vulnerable<br>innards from predators. But think about it -- a dinosaur wins against pretty<br>much everything (except maybe a literal meteor). In a recent poll, most<br>scientists agreed that a dinosaur could totally destroy a datacenter if it<br>really wanted to.

Anti-AI dinosaurs have already passed experimental trials in Japan.

In 1974, apes from Black Hole Planet 3 built a space-titanium imitation of<br>Godzilla, which rampaged across Japan. But Mechagodzilla's disguise burned off<br>and Godzilla (with assistance from the Okinawan guardian beast) turned him into<br>a magnet and then tore his head off.

In 1975, the ape aliens built Mechagodzilla 2, who rampaged across Japan with<br>Dr. Mafune's sea beast Titanosaurus. But Dr. Mafune's cyborg daughter discovered<br>she was Mechagodzilla's wireless transmitter, and shot herself to sever the<br>link. Godzilla seized this opportunity to decapitate Mechagodzilla 2 and blast<br>its corpse with his signature heat ray.

Model Weights

Mass is estimated; only Chinese weights are public.

Sustainability

This chart assumes dinosaurs are ectotherms, not endotherms.

Dinosaurs are energy-efficient from cradle to plate! Dinosaur meat is a natural<br>superfood -- rich in protein or omega-3 or something. We expect it to fetch a<br>heavy premium at fancy steak restaurants when it first comes out.

We're committed to 100% circularity. Surplus dinosaur parts will be fully<br>recycled into coal at our proprietary underground facilities.

Alignment

Everybody loves dinosaurs! Don't you want to cuddle these gentle giants?

Purchase our official life-sized Stegosaurus plushie from selected<br>distributors.

Copyright

Contrary to popular belief, most dinosaurs pose no copyright infringement risks.

The Land Before Time (1988) was a decent film with superb animation, but the<br>child-friendly sequels really tarnished the brand. We expect a reboot any year<br>now.

Jim Henson's Dinosaurs aired on ABC from 1991 to 1994. Although targeted at a<br>family audience, it somehow covered complex topics like sexual harassment,<br>censorship, religion, steroid abuse, masturbation, and corporate crime. It got<br>surprisingly good reviews; many appreciated its creepy-but-well-executed<br>practical effects.

Economic Outlook

Top economists expect AI to take ~99% (±5%) of human jobs. We believe Jurassic<br>Park is the ultimate jobs program.

AI cannot raise cattle, nor feed them to raptors with Spielberg's cinematic<br>finesse. It cannot pick up mountains of feces ("poop") without a mechanized<br>corporeal form. Human jobs are safe as long as we have dinosaurs.

Ancient humans harnessed the power of megafauna for megaprojects. According to<br>The History Channel, ancient Egyptians used terrestrial sauropods to build the<br>Great Pyramid of Giza.

Roadmap

Phase 1: Completed. Resort and theme park construction on Little Saint<br>James Island.

Phase 2a: Ongoing. Research begins into growing organic dinosaurs in<br>vivo.

Phase 2b: Coming soon. Park opens with really big horses and "killer"<br>mechanized dinosaurs (built by Boston Dynamics). Our robosaurs will run the<br>latest Grok 6.9 Mechahitler.

Phase 3: Probably. Jurassic Cafe adds literal dinosaur nuggets to the<br>menu -- tastes like chicken.

Phase 4: Eventually. First organic dinosaurs enter the park.

Phase 5: Secure AI datacenter (with a big off-switch for safety)<br>constructed inside the T-Rex exhibit.

Phase 6: The Loch Ness Monster fights Shamu clones in The Splash<br>Coliseum™️ on Saturdays and Sundays.

AI scientists were so preoccupied with whether they could, they didn't stop to<br>think if they should. Luckily, our dino scientists are doing what they must.

We're so excited to send you back to the stone age.

Disclosure: This post was partially funded by The Reptilian World<br>Government.